- Kids are Psychic and know your name (Until you realise you are wearing a name badge.)
- You can watch entire films while working (In 2 minute blocks that are out of sequence)
- Sticky popcorn and carpet is a terrible combination
- People leave enough half-bags of pick and mix to feed a third world country
- Nuclear popcorn fallout is a thing.
- Credit watchers are a thing (For EVERY film.)
- The daily rota is an excellent canvas for doodling in your spare time.
- You will have hours of nothing to do.
- You will have hours of everything to do.
- Cinemas serve the messiest noisiest food (Because they can, bitch.)
- You'll meet some cool, crazy and miscellaneous people.
- Just make it a large.
- Spouses will leave their significant others to park the car while they get a good seat
- Live ballet being streamed to a screen is a fantastic idea.
- Hot dog steam is scolding hot.
- Eye contact is key.
- The popcorn is everywhere.
- You will check a film, you will walk into a steamy sex scene and back out slowly.
- Subtitles are a fun rarity [GRUNTING INTENSIFIES]
- You realise where the old people go on Monday afternoons.
- If you're not on duty COVER IT UP. (Your uniform that is.)
- Something fucked up. Call the manager.
- The actual professional cleaners exist, but never when you're around.
- You resign to the fact that the cinema time leaflet knows more about what’s on than you do.
- You have never heard of this film, but the old ladies say it’s bad.
- You know all the door codes and feel like a secret agent.
- THE BIN BAG IS LEAKING.
- The massive computer's upstairs do all the projecting.
- Popping popcorn is mesmerizing.
- Grabbing the mop makes your feel like a superhero.
- You have to explain that you don’t make the prices.
- The lights will come up on their own (Unless something fucks up.)
- No, I don’t know what is coming out this summer. I’m just paid to rip your ticket. Let me rip your ticket. Please. Wait, come back. I meant screen 9 not screen 4.
And that's only after 2 weeks.
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